I remember that one lonely night.

I remember the world was colored pink,

and that everything seemed so surreal,

and the universe forced me to be happy.

I remember the world was spinning around,

and all I wanted was to jump right into the core of the spiral.

I remember turning down everyone’s offer to take me home. I was more than alright, it was not necessary.

I remember that was not the actual reason. I simply wanted to be by myself, because I knew I was actually dejected.

I remember that I knew exactly the colored-pink was probably only the mix of red and white liquors I just drank — glasses after glasses.

I remember everyone giving up. I remember how they left. How they blamed my immaturity.

I remember that I sat alone, and all the instant happiness was gone. I guess the substance had gotten real hard to my head that I started to recall all the bad things.

I remember crying, silently.

But I could not remember whatever else I did there at that moment, until I saw you coming in, smiling.

I can not imagine how I looked and how my expression was – but you told me later I was sighing heavily and did not seem to be fond of your presence.

I remember I asked you what you were doing, and you said you thought it was too early to go home.

You said you happened to know where I was and thought you should just drop by to spend time.

You told me I did not need to worry because it did not matter what I was doing, you just needed a place to stop by.

You said you would not ask me a single question, but you would not be bothered to listen if I wanted to share something.

Please do not mind me, do as you please, you said.

And I resumed crying, like no one was there.

Because you wanted to be there and I happened to be there, and you would not care, so it did not matter for me.

All I wished for was to cry with no one around. All those strangers sitting in those tables around me, were no one for me. And you, too, were no one.

I can’t remember how long it was til I felt so tired and sleepy and sober at the same time. I raised my head and saw you still there, wearing the same smile you had when you first came in.

You stayed there for hours until it was too late for you to go home.

I hate to admit it, but I was happy seeing you there. That I was not alone.

I guess it would be fine even if you were not there, I used to get through days just like that any way.

But being not alone was not that bad either. It was nice, in fact.

There was the start of our routine.

For the next few months of me being pathetic, you were always there to “drop by and spend time”.

Now that I look back, I am actually feeling quite grateful,

that there is this one person who chose to stay,

even after you told them you wanted to be alone and everyone else decided to just let you be.